Happy Father's Day

"They still bear fruit in old age; they are ever full of sap and green.." 

I know you have deep sadness in your life, much of it we carry together. Loved ones gone, estranged, or miles away, even the good memories we share seem to hold a breath of pain. However, I find comfort in the twinkle of your soft blue eyes whenever you tell one of your medical team members a corny joke. 

Or when you hold out your fist to each resident as you roll by. And they bump your fist with theirs. And you make them smile. 

I love on the video chats with your great-grandchildren how you call them each by their full names as if somehow this acknowledgement causes the moment to press deeper into your soul. These happy moments - I know you don't want to forget them. I love that you lived to see my grandchildren, and I love how you tell yours that you're praying God's very best for them every single day. And you do. 

I guess I shouldn't be surprised by all of your visitors; even though you are a quiet man, you are kind and gentle. It says so much about their character, and about yours, the Christ-likeness. Neither goes unnoticed to me. 

I'm sorry Mom has been gone for so long now, but I not sorry for how much better I know you. And you know me. I smile and laugh through tears when I think of the arguments we've had and how much patience you shower on me as I navigate this uncharted journey through decisions, paper work, appointments, and attempting to take your fun foods away. 

I have to admit I love the Wendy's meals we've shared in your little room, and the baseball games, and watching Sovereignty run his races has been an extra special blessing. And what a perfect, poignant name!  A handsome descendant of the legendary Secretariat we kept up with together in his glorious victories that summer I turned nine and cheered as he won the Triple Crown. 

I love the joy we've experienced together, but I don't despise the heartache we've endured because it's made us both stronger and better. I love how God has used every inch of our pain to draw us together and into Christ, preparing for us both an eternal weight of glory in the life to come. 

I pray God will let me bring you home soon. I know you're tired and ready, but I pray he grants us a bit more time together before he takes you to the home he's preparing for you. I know that's probably selfish, but I cherish you, Dad. 

I love how you pray for me every time I have to leave you, and you say, "I'm okay. Tell the ducks hello."  

"I love birds because of you, Dad. You instilled that in me. 

And I love you too. 

Happy Father's Day, Dad! 

💙

"The righteous flourish like a palm tree and grow like a cedar in Lebanon. They are planted in the house of the LORD; they flourish in the courts of our God. They still bear fruit in old age; they are ever full of sap and green, to declare that the LORD is upright; he is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in him." ( Psalm 92:12-15 )